............................................................................ ......::::..|...###.....###...###...###.....#######.....###......;;;;....... .....::::..-*-...###.....###..%##....###.....##..%##.....###....;;;;;;...... ....::::....|...##.##....#####%##...##.##....##...%##...##.##..;;;;;;;;..... .....::::......#######...##.#####..#######...##...%##..#######..;;;;;;...... ......::::....###...###..##...###.###...###..##..%##..###...###..;;####..... .............###.....######...%#####.....###############.....###..###.##.... *****###****###***********************************************###**#**##**** ## ## ### I S S U E # 0 5 2 0 5 - 0 3 - 0 0 ### #### ### # ### ####### #### ### "Babes in Toyland vs. Kittie" ### ####### by Phairgirl #### I LOVE METAL. I WANT TO FIX IT. I am deeply disturbed about the present state of the genre. I mean, it really disturbs me that Limp Bizkit exists. They started out ripping off Korn, and when the whiney white boy schtick wore thin, they decided to go the Public Enemy and Anthrax route and mix PHAT BEATS in with the loud loud loud. I hate to break it to ya, Mr. Durst, but they did it better 10 years ago. Also note: bright red baseball caps are neither metal nor hip-hop. The only crowd that will give you props with that gear will be frat boys. Anyway, that's another file. So where is metal today? Well, there's P.O.D. (oh yes, THERE'S quality) and Staind and Godsmack and System of a Down and Coal Chamber and Fear Factory and Powerman 5000 and Slipknot... and so many, many more. Some of those bands aren't doing metal, they're doing that metal/rap thing. Some are covering songs from the 80s to get a hit. Still others have decided to take that alternametal thing that Alice in Chains did so well and give that another push. And the rest of them are just trying to follow Rob/White Zombie around and do everything he does. Sad. And then there's Kittie. I bought the CD because I thought I might like them, plus they had a cool band name. LISTEN TO ME NOW: never buy a CD just because the name of the band rules. This was the only CD I've ever bought that I couldn't listen to the whole way through. I own over 700 CDs. Think about it. Seriously though, what is my problem with Kittie? Well, Kittie basically ripped off Babes in Toyland. Keep in mind that I ADORE BIT. Kittie does the EXACT same thing where they sound like an innocent little girl and then they GROWL AND SHRIEK. They sound EXACTLY like a well- produced BIT cover band, only BIT had better lyrics and worse production. I suppose it was about time that someone recognized how much Babes ruled and gave them their props, except it just hasn't worked out that way. Not cool. Now, before you get all uppity about the differences between Babes and Kittie, I should clarify: nobody is a 100% ripoff. I mean, a copy is still a copy, and unless we're talking burning CDs or cloning, there are no exact duplicates. However, the similarities between the droolworthy, oldschool badasses Babes in Toyland and the neophyte wannabe harcore whiners Kittie are just a little too numerous. Granted, if Kittie WAS a 100% clone, I'd like their music. Alas. I thought about this a little too much. Feel free to compare and contrast the lyrical stylings of the two bands: Babes In Toyland Kittie -------------------------------------------------------------------------- | I live it high cost of livin | She's just a paper doll, that's all | | tell me why you give it all | Just a paper doll | | Inside you gotta head high | I dress her up she knocked me down | | one size fits all | They tried her on for size, | | Head ride you decide | she fits nice | | | One size fits all | -------------------------------------------------------------------------- | Asphixid | Why do I get shit all the time from | | My thighs are vices | you men | | He is a stupid man | You are swine | | I love him all I can you | You think dick is the answer | | fucking bitch | But it's not | -------------------------------------------------------------------------- | YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE! | PEDOPHILE! SEDUCTION! TIED DOWN! | | YOU'RE DEAD MEAT MOTHERFUCKER! | DECAPITATION! LISTEN! OOOH! YOU | | YOU DON'T TRY TO RAPE A GODDESS! | HYPOCRITE! | | | THIS IS THE END! SUCK IT! | -------------------------------------------------------------------------- | I've got a crotch that talks | Self-loathing, inconsiderate, | | It talks to all the cocks | too scared of what I'll be | | It's been twelve city blocks | I look into the mirror | | you fucking bitch | The whore is all I see | -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The biggest problem I've noticed in trying to come up with compares and contrasts is that most of Kittie's lyrics are like, "I loved you and then you fucked me over, you asshole (YOU CAN EAT A DICK)" while BIT's lyrics are more like "I'm a fucking bitch, don't fuck with me, nobody can ever fuck me over." It's amusing how Kittie tries so hard to sound as badass as the Babes, but all they can do is carry on and on about boys are dumb. Yawn. Another problem I have with Kittie is this: Hole already ripped off BIT and did it much better. Hell, Courtney Love even wore the same outfits that Kat Bjelland did, with the same fucked up makeup and the same bleached out hair. And Hole had much cooler lyrics. And Hole didn't fucking WHINE. Hole just decided to take BIT to the alterna-extreme, while Kittie has decided to take it to the growly death metal extreme. The former worked much better than the latter. Anyway, after all of this opining and criticism, I figured I should find out some things about Kittie to give them a fair shot I suppose, or to possibly explain why they are who they are. Well, they're Canadian. Minus three points. Canada has spawned some of the most evil concoctions in music history with only minimal exceptions. Also, they're all, like, LITTLE. They're still doing the whole teenage angst crap. READ: teenage angst can never and will never be done better than Trent Reznor, so stop trying. Then I saw what the girls looked like. Uh oh. GOTH GIRLS FROM CANADA. YEAH, NOW I TAKE THEM SERIOUSLY. Babes in Toyland have been around longer than I can probably trace without going to extremes of reading more than I care to on the subject. They were innovators. Nobody sounded like Kat Bjelland (some would argue on the Siouxie Sioux tip, or possibly Wendy O. Williams, but their music was a totally different style and audience). They were one of the few true female garage bands that kicked ass (lumping into that category would also include L7, but Kittie is probably to afraid of them to rip them off) and had some semblance of lyrical grace. Oh, and let's not forget that it's the video for "Bruise Violet" by the Babes that was featured on Beavis and Butthead that got Beavis so excited shouting "FIRE" that made 2 little kids burn down their house. That's style, I tell ya. Kittie doesn't have style. They have kitsch. All things aside, when it comes right down to the music, Kittie just fucking sucks. As I noted previously, I couldn't listen to the whole damn album. I shut it off with 2 or 3 songs left to go. It was all the exact same. Loud. Growl and chatter, growl and chatter. Nothing resembling anything that couldn't be taught to anyone to play in a month's time. Their transitions are horrid. Babes in Toyland weren't exactly virtuosos either, but their music was varied and fit. Hell, they had talent; listen to "Short Song" from _Fontanelle_. They made SONGS, they made MUSIC. Kittie makes NOISE. The only thing that makes Kittie sound better is that Kittie had a producer that slicked everything up. On the occasional song of theirs that breaks down, you can hear the rhythmic inconsistencies. They're a bunch of little canadian girls. Period. Also noted, according to Metal Sludge (www.metal-sludge.com), their publicist wouldn't let Kittie do the tough-ass Metal Sludge 20-question interview. They're being led around by the biz. Kittie is a machine, people. They want you to buy their album and make the company lots and lots of money, people. Hot goth chicks that scream, people. Buy into the propaganda, people. **************************************************************************** # (c)2000 aNAda e'zine aNAda052 .*. by Phairgirl # ............................................................................